[ Haruaki nods, looking sidelong at Sano with a smile. ]
I don't like being away from all of my students, and Miki-sensei and Hatanaka-sensei... but there are things in this world we'd probably never get to experience in our own.
[ A little nudge now, shoulder sloping down to meet shoulder. ]
[ Haruaki waits a few moments. They walk down the coast in silence, blue sand crunching beneath their shoes, unfamiliar stars twinkling overhead.
He feels such a profound gratitude for this whole world. Even when it's scary, even when it's dangerous– he's already gotten so much more here than he ever could have dreamed of back home, and now he can share that with Sano, too. ]
Without all that weird stuff going on with people's ages a little while ago... I may have never learned that you were the little Mii-kun that gave me that talisman and saved my life.
[The bafflement only increases, becomes something soft, almost cautious, or maybe even fearful, somehow... Sano stares at his teacher, his friend, a man he'd do anything to save - anytime, every time.
[He is so often a failure. He is someone who has caused unimaginable pain and suffering, whose guilt rules him in ways few, if any, could ever understand. He still sees visions of the people he's hurt, blood on the walls.
[He worries he'll fail. Every time, he worries he'll fail.
[He isn't good enough. Strong enough, but unable to control it. He wants to be like Haruaki, to solve things with peace, to not rely on anger and frustration, the ever-present threat of an explosion...
[It makes his face crumple for just a minute, and he has to look away, glaring at the sand, breath arrested in his lungs.]
You kept it all those years...I didn't think...I'd...
[He didn't think it would save him. He didn't think it would matter the way it does...]
[ Haruaki takes one big step to get a pace ahead of Sano and then turns, stopping right in front of him, reaching out to hold him by the shoulders. His hands squeeze, warm and reassuring, because Sano doesn't have to speak all those dark troubles in his heart – Haruaki knows them just from a glance.
If there's one person in the world who doesn't make Sano feel like a harbinger of miserable, chaotic destruction, let it be him. ]
You've been watching over me for much longer than either of us knew. Thank you, Sano-kun.
[He's taken by the shoulders, steadied, cared for. He told Haruaki once that being with him makes his worries feel stupid, and he'd said so with joy in his heart, so rarely felt. He feels vulnerable and young, unable to control the expression on his face, warm guilt. He shakes his head a bit.]
[ Haruaki can never hide a single thing he feels. When the surprise washes over him, it's visible – his eyes go almost comically wide, cowlick curling into a question mark atop his head. ]
You did? Wait! You really did?
[ ... ]
Is that why you were so kind to me right away...?
THE FUCKING QUESTION MARK I SINCERELY HOPE HE SUFFERS AND DIES
[Sano just barely shakes his head, the smallest smile warming on his lips. That guilty, burdened look starts to fade as he recalls his teacher, hiding under the podium on his first day.]
No. You were afraid. I knew you didn't have to be.
It felt familiar, though... [Don't worry. We're not going to eat you.]
[ And then those gentle, glittering tears burst forth like geysers as he wraps both arms around his treasured student, his cherished friend, and clings for dear life. ]
Sano-kuuuuuuuuuuuun!!! I want us to protect each other forever!!!!!!!
[Those slowly pooling, glistening tears have just enough time to pull at Sano's heartstrings before Haruaki's sobbing, stuck to him like a starfish. Sano places a hand on Haruaki's head, trying to pry him off.]
[ And in response to that, Haruaki only clings tighter, practically lifts Sano off the ground from the force with which he begins to sway both of them back and forth. ]
Forever and ever and ever! Even after you graduate! Even when I'm Old and Gray-aki and I'm ready to shuffle off this mortal coil and go to the great sailor uniform in the sky!!!!
[ How is it possible to cry so hard yet be so, so very happy? Haruaki laughs through his theatrical tears, hugs Sano tighter beneath the stars, begins to spin him around. Sorry, but this spiral isn't ending. He may never let go. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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It is... I guess it really is proof we're in a totally different world. Even though all kinds of weird stuff happens to us, I never expected that!
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The sand is blue. Nothing's the same at all.
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Don't you think it's beautiful? At least a little bit?
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[Sano can't deny that. There are a lot of beautiful things in this place, but it lacks what's most important.
[Not entirely, though. Sano watches Haruaki as they walk.]
Do you like it here?
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I don't like being away from all of my students, and Miki-sensei and Hatanaka-sensei... but there are things in this world we'd probably never get to experience in our own.
[ A little nudge now, shoulder sloping down to meet shoulder. ]
Can you think of an example?
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Is this a lesson?
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[ He just can't help himself. ]
I can give you an example first, if you want!
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[ Haruaki waits a few moments. They walk down the coast in silence, blue sand crunching beneath their shoes, unfamiliar stars twinkling overhead.
He feels such a profound gratitude for this whole world. Even when it's scary, even when it's dangerous– he's already gotten so much more here than he ever could have dreamed of back home, and now he can share that with Sano, too. ]
Without all that weird stuff going on with people's ages a little while ago... I may have never learned that you were the little Mii-kun that gave me that talisman and saved my life.
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Saved your life...
What do you mean by that?
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That fire at the department store. Remember? Mii-kun was the one who guided that little zashiki-warashi and I to safety.
I never told you, because... well, because I didn't know it was you!
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[He is so often a failure. He is someone who has caused unimaginable pain and suffering, whose guilt rules him in ways few, if any, could ever understand. He still sees visions of the people he's hurt, blood on the walls.
[He worries he'll fail. Every time, he worries he'll fail.
[He isn't good enough. Strong enough, but unable to control it. He wants to be like Haruaki, to solve things with peace, to not rely on anger and frustration, the ever-present threat of an explosion...
[It makes his face crumple for just a minute, and he has to look away, glaring at the sand, breath arrested in his lungs.]
You kept it all those years...I didn't think...I'd...
[He didn't think it would save him. He didn't think it would matter the way it does...]
Haru-- Eh...
Seimei...geez...
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[ Haruaki takes one big step to get a pace ahead of Sano and then turns, stopping right in front of him, reaching out to hold him by the shoulders. His hands squeeze, warm and reassuring, because Sano doesn't have to speak all those dark troubles in his heart – Haruaki knows them just from a glance.
If there's one person in the world who doesn't make Sano feel like a harbinger of miserable, chaotic destruction, let it be him. ]
You've been watching over me for much longer than either of us knew. Thank you, Sano-kun.
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I did know. Not about the fire, but...
I knew. As soon as I saw you again.
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You did? Wait! You really did?
[ ... ]
Is that why you were so kind to me right away...?
THE FUCKING QUESTION MARK I SINCERELY HOPE HE SUFFERS AND DIES
No. You were afraid. I knew you didn't have to be.
It felt familiar, though... [Don't worry. We're not going to eat you.]
I realized pretty quick.
get ready to hope for that even harder 1/2
Beneath the light of that glorious moon and all those unfamiliar stars, the tears that begin to pool in Haruaki's eyes glisten brighter than usual. ]
S... Sano-kun...
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Sano-kuuuuuuuuuuuun!!! I want us to protect each other forever!!!!!!!
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Shut up. We will, stupid.
[He's laughing.]
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Forever and ever and ever! Even after you graduate! Even when I'm Old and Gray-aki and I'm ready to shuffle off this mortal coil and go to the great sailor uniform in the sky!!!!
1/2
2/2
I said we will!
[Mercifully, Sano doesn't think about what comes after "forever and ever and ever".]
You don't have to worry about that, okay? I promise.
CRIES DO WE WANNA WRAP???
I promise, too! I'll promise it a million times!