[ Akira meanwhile is still sitting on the bed, lounging in post-kiss bliss with one leg slung over the other and an unspoken amount of effort put into saying a certain name. ]
[ Everything Akira said about him still rings out in his head. The kiss didn't push it from his mind โ no, it only amplified it, made it mean more. It's not that Haruaki feels like he needs to say something too, he knows Akira didn't say that with any expectations, but...
He wants to.
And all Haruaki can ever do is follow what he wants. ]
You care so much about making sure other people are looked after, it's almost scary! [ Well, a lot of the time it is scary, butโ no, that's not the point. ] And even the most hard-working person I can think of would look lazy next to you! You never give up on taking care of people, even when they try to run away!
[ These... are good points, right? Things Haruaki admires about him? Yes, for better and for worse!
That impassioned fire behind his little speech dies down into a low smolder, and the next words come out far more affectionate because of it. ]
I think people get too intimidated by you to realize you have a big heart, too, but it's right there, isn't it? I didn't have to tell you about that little zashiki-warashi for more than a minute before you offered to take her in. You're really amazing, you know.
[ Just he way he's sitting there, relaxed and assured of himself as ever...
It's not a new observation; Haruaki's thought it since they first met. It's not unique, either โ he thinks this of most men he meets. And he's dead set certain that Akira's heard it many times throughout his life. But none of that means it's less important for him to put it out there plainly: ]
And... you're a really handsome guy.
[ Oh, he'd managed to get that flush under control in preparation for facing his students again, but it comes back full force now.
Perhaps even worse than that, his cowlick takes on the shape of a heart. ]
So, I guess I just wanted to say that I'm glad I got bullied by my students about reaching adulthood without ever having gotten a kiss from anyone, but most of all... I'm glad it was you!
the way i can't even begin to write this the way i wanna you're the wooOOOOOORST
[ We're sorry. You have reached a dodomeki that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel you have reached this recording in error, please check the dodomeki and try your call again.
Which is to say, at first everything Haruaki says is met with complete silence and a valiant attempt at Akira's face keeping itself at its neutral smile as much as it can. He manages it, too, for most of that time.
Until he tries to speak again. ]
That. That mea-- [ Cough, COUGH, ahem, just a little tickle in his throat. Certainly not something wet rising through his system, not at all. ] Hearing that means a lot, Abe-sensei.
He really should've expected something like this. Even he's not delusional enough to think he managed to get his words out clean and confident, and Haruaki isn't the type of person to ignore any signs of distress like that.
Which makes it much harder to keep up the already crumbling pretense of being completely fine. Nothing's spilling over just yet but his eyes are noticeably wetter, fighting against the soft pressure of his smile, so, so fond of the man he can't tear his gaze away from. ]
I will. I promise I'll tell you everything down to the smaaaallest little detail.
[ Haruaki sees that bright sheen of unshed tears, and it twists something in his chest that no one else has ever quite managed to touch before. He doesn't know why Akira's so affected exactly, but...
That doesn't change anything. He knew Akira had a soft heart beneath it all, and he'll protect it with all he's got.
And he's got quite a lot.
He squeezes Akira's shoulders, voice quiet. ]
No rush. Tell me when you're ready. I can wait.
[ He ducks in closer, presses his lips to Akira's cheek. It lingers there for a couple seconds before he straightens up, his own cheeks flushing bright. ]
[ That hand might as well be inside his chest instead, squeezing at his heart, because it would be getting the same exact results.
Akira can't help it, reaches up to place a hand on one of Haruaki's, wants to squeeze it himself and keep them both there but...there is still a world outside them.
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A. Be. Sen. Sei?โก
gross. god. bye
He wants to.
And all Haruaki can ever do is follow what he wants. ]
You care so much about making sure other people are looked after, it's almost scary! [ Well, a lot of the time it is scary, butโ no, that's not the point. ] And even the most hard-working person I can think of would look lazy next to you! You never give up on taking care of people, even when they try to run away!
[ These... are good points, right? Things Haruaki admires about him? Yes, for better and for worse!
That impassioned fire behind his little speech dies down into a low smolder, and the next words come out far more affectionate because of it. ]
I think people get too intimidated by you to realize you have a big heart, too, but it's right there, isn't it? I didn't have to tell you about that little zashiki-warashi for more than a minute before you offered to take her in. You're really amazing, you know.
[ Just he way he's sitting there, relaxed and assured of himself as ever...
It's not a new observation; Haruaki's thought it since they first met. It's not unique, either โ he thinks this of most men he meets. And he's dead set certain that Akira's heard it many times throughout his life. But none of that means it's less important for him to put it out there plainly: ]
And... you're a really handsome guy.
[ Oh, he'd managed to get that flush under control in preparation for facing his students again, but it comes back full force now.
Perhaps even worse than that, his cowlick takes on the shape of a heart. ]
So, I guess I just wanted to say that I'm glad I got bullied by my students about reaching adulthood without ever having gotten a kiss from anyone, but most of all... I'm glad it was you!
the way i can't even begin to write this the way i wanna you're the wooOOOOOORST
Which is to say, at first everything Haruaki says is met with complete silence and a valiant attempt at Akira's face keeping itself at its neutral smile as much as it can. He manages it, too, for most of that time.
Until he tries to speak again. ]
That. That mea-- [ Cough, COUGH, ahem, just a little tickle in his throat. Certainly not something wet rising through his system, not at all. ] Hearing that means a lot, Abe-sensei.
More than you can know.
hehes louder and louder
Haruaki was ready to zoom out the door after that speech, hurry down to class, butโ
He's never heard Akira's voice sound like that before. The words come out a little tighter, and with a surprisingly heavy weight to them.
He pauses, thenโ
Darts back over to the bed in the blink of an eye, hands on Akira's shoulders as he leans down close to his face. ]
Tell me sometime. Okay? I want to know.
no subject
He really should've expected something like this. Even he's not delusional enough to think he managed to get his words out clean and confident, and Haruaki isn't the type of person to ignore any signs of distress like that.
Which makes it much harder to keep up the already crumbling pretense of being completely fine. Nothing's spilling over just yet but his eyes are noticeably wetter, fighting against the soft pressure of his smile, so, so fond of the man he can't tear his gaze away from. ]
I will. I promise I'll tell you everything down to the smaaaallest little detail.
sickening..... SICKENINGGGGGGGGG
That doesn't change anything. He knew Akira had a soft heart beneath it all, and he'll protect it with all he's got.
And he's got quite a lot.
He squeezes Akira's shoulders, voice quiet. ]
No rush. Tell me when you're ready. I can wait.
[ He ducks in closer, presses his lips to Akira's cheek. It lingers there for a couple seconds before he straightens up, his own cheeks flushing bright. ]
I'll see you after class?
CHEWS YOU CHEWS YOU CHEWS YOU
Akira can't help it, reaches up to place a hand on one of Haruaki's, wants to squeeze it himself and keep them both there but...there is still a world outside them.
So instead, he simply nods. ]
Mm. I'll see you then.